Copycat

I'll admit, this is a response/me being a copy cat. Yesterday, Jacquelynn wrote a beautiful blog about our relationship. It made me smile a lot, though sadly, mostly on the inside. I was a little grumpy yesterday. I don't really know why. But, I just would like to say that Jacquelynn Glass is an amazing girl. I am thankful, daily, that she is in my life. There are times that I don't know what I would do without her. I am so madly in love with her. More in love with her than with anyone else. She means the world to me. It's exciting and scary to have these feelings. So exciting because these feelings make me feel amazing every single day of my life. It's so wonderful. But... She also has a lot of power over me and my happiness. It is quite scary to think about. There is no one else, however, that I would want to trust my heart to. I do it gladly. My heart is hers. And I would have it no other way.

So I Was Doing this One Thing...

I was cleaning my room and I got really bummed out for some reason. Out of no where. I have been on a roller-coaster of emotions today. All over the place. It's kinda crazy. I am sure a decent amount has happened since I last blogged, but I am not sure I remember it. 

I have been talking to an old friend again. Ryan. I haven't spoken to him in years. A lot of bad stuff happened between me and him when I was dating an ex. About my ex. He asked her out a few times, did some other stuff, and generally made me unhappy. Best case, he disregarded our friendship of...6 years, i think, and messed around with my girlfriend behind my back. The details are a little shaky and I don't know what I believe a lot of the times. Regardless of what happened though, one of the first things that was sad when we talked about the past was that he was sorry about what happened. So, yeah, I am glad that Ryan is back in my life. I am a little worried about him at the moment though. Something just seems off...I just texted him.

I worked one of my hardest weeks ever. It was a little fun. I may have worked over 40 hours...which really isn't that much, but I'm not supposed to work over time...the school doesn't like that. It may have happened anyway though. In this week, I worked a wedding for a bunch of people. I have decided that it was the second hardest job I have ever had. Working as a utility for a sports game is still a lot harder, camera equipment is very heavy. Especially up stadium stairs. Lots of stairs. But yeah..anyway i just got distracted..

So my roommates piss me off sometimes. It was so quiet up until 2 minutes ago. They weren't here and it was easy to focus on everything. Now it is hard to focus on anything. They are so loud. David and Josh are both SO loud. Even their quiet is loud. I am generally a quiet person. Loud people annoy me a lot. They also annoyed me in other ways which have gotten better recently. Partially. Partially because I stopped cleaning the kitchen so much and left it for them to do once in awhile. Josh has started to clean. It's awesome. David is still a problem in the sense that I have never seen a spacier person. After cleaning the kitchen, David decided that it was time to make himself dinner...taking over the kitchen...which I had just cleaned. Twice. And now, I know that I should probably have said words to him. But I was just in awe the first time and flabbergasted the second time. They are both very much themselves centered. Not really self-centered. It's not in a deliberate way or anything...it's complicated. AND I don't go out of my way to do stuff for them ALL the time. But, when I cook, I clean all the dishes. Including the ones I just used. When I make a mess, I cleaning it up. I don't eat all the food, nor do I "destroy" the food I know someone else bought specially. I pay attention to what I am doing. And I don't break their stuff. One of my games is broken. Unplayable. But I am nice. They currently have a different game of mine they are obsessing over. If that breaks though. They are buying me a new one.

Oh, and Travis. He came back for a bit. Currently not here at the moment. I still need to write down my thoughts about him in my notebook. I don't really want to write them one line. They are a bit complicated as it is. Yeah. I don't even know what to say here. I think that is everything.

Five!

Soooo Hello there people reading my blog! I would just like to say that I woke up this morning a very happy person. First of all, I woke up to a phone call from my lovely girlfriend, her voice always makes me smile. Secondly, I have been dating Jacquelynn for 5 months now. Yep, it's a little crazy when I think about it. She has been my best friend for years. It's crazy that it took this long for us to realize that we might actually be suited for each other. But I like that it did. "It couldn't have happened any other way" which is a line from a movie that made me fucking cry. I'm not going to say which. Because it would probably be a spoiler.

Anyway. Five months. I am pretty happy about that. It's nice to have the word Girlfriend associated with Jacquelynn. Sadly though I am broke. We are both broke. That trip was quite expensive! But since we are so broke we didn't have any money to spend on gifts. She set me a card that had "call me" on the front. Even though she was getting a card to tell me sweet things and for our five months, she couldn't resist torturing me with that song just a little bit more. Thanks babe. I recorded her the three chapter things of
Wicked. We have wanted to read it for awhile but just haven't had the time or rather matched up time, to do it! So I decided to do some for her. Recording the first bit was easy. 12 minutes of recorded audio became a 6 minute chapter. The second was a bitch. 41 minutes became 14. That was a very long edit day. Pretty crazy. It helped a lot with the learning though, for both reading and editing. The next was only 31 minutes for a little over 20 minute episode. Overall it was really fun. If she likes it I'll do the whole book for her! I am already missing editing and reading.

5 months. Very happy times. I am hoping that this is the first five month celebration of many to come.

Hungry

So I am currently "talking to Jacquelynn while she is trying to set up an alias for her hotmail. She just gave up because it wasn't working too well. She is getting a little frustrated. Sadly, it is a little cute. This could cause problems in the future. It just did kinda. A little spat. But that is okay. Cause she looooooves me. Anyway, we are both feeling super anti social at the moment. Which would be super awesome if we were close to one another. Because cuddles and stuff. Instead, I am looking at her pixely face through a computer. I mean, i would rather this than nothing, but it just makes me a little sad that we are so far away from each other. Long distance sucks. And it is super expensive, because of plane tickets. I really want this Thanksgiving visit to work. Because I miss her so much already. Anyway, that is all. I am starved. But there is people in my living room and I don't want to go out there.....so much hunger!

One Short Week

Starting last Saturday I spent 7 days in Hillsdale Michigan visiting Jacquelynn Glass. My long time friend of many years and my friendationship thing for over 4 months. I was extremely nervous about arriving at a place that I had never been before and to see a girl in real life that I had really only interacted with over the internet. What made things worse was that I had to first go through three hours of a car ride with her parents. I had not met her parents before this point. I don't really do well with meeting people in general, and these people were the barrier to the person I really liked. And it was their daughter. I was riding with the FATHER to go spend a week with his precious little girl. It wasn't a bad car ride at all. Her parents were quite tired since they had been up since 4 in the morning, Vegas Time. It was a little quiet, but I tried to talk as much as I could and jabber away about things I knew without being too opinionated. There may be a time for that later, but arguments then was not good. A lot of hot issue topics didn't really come up however, mostly just simple things about the drive and travel. I really hope I made a good first impression. I tried real hard!

When we arrived at her house, I started to panic. I wasn't ready. Even though I had known we were getting really close, I wasn't ready. I was about to meet Jacquelynn! The girl of my dreams! I saw the door to the house open and my heart started pounding. I remember the way she walked out of the house. She came up to the car and pressed her face against the window. She was so close. I got out of the car and just stood around awkwardly. She was hugging her parents who had been gone for a week. I am so glad that happened first, I don't know what I would have done otherwise. I turned back toward her mother, who she had been hugging and saw her standing there looking at me. In that moment, as she started running toward me, so many things just clicked into place for me. I caught her in a huge hug that transferred from the air to the ground. I was so happy in that moment. I don't even know how to describe it. We just fell into place from there. We walked inside, I didn't let her carry anything, partially because her gifts were in my computer bag, and the suitcase is heavy...I'm terrible I know, but it's just how I am. Anyway, standing in her house we just started holding hands. There was zero awkwardness. To which I am so grateful. There was a lot of tension though. When giving me a tour our faces met quite close. We both knew that a kiss was coming. We both felt it. I have to say, this was my favorite first kiss. I haven't had many so it seems a little weird, but it was just different. It was a HUGE build up. I felt it every time I turned to look at her face. it was at least an hour I think. It was just so perfect to me. Same night I buttered her up with three little owls and asked her to be my girlfriend. Done. I was dating a beautiful girl. We updated facebook right after it was done. We were both so excited to finally be able to say it. We had been toying around it for years. I almost can't believe that I can call her my girlfriend. Much smiles.

Sunday! I went to bed Saturday night and woke up Sunday morning afraid that it had all been a dream. Seeing that I was in a hotel room made my heart swell. I was up about two hours before we had agreed to "set and alarm for". I laid in bed too excited to sleep. I wanted to see Jacquelynn again. Turns out she was having a similar problem and we just decided to fuck sleep and start our day. Which was awesome. She made me breakfast food. I LOVE breakfast food. Hashbrowns, eggs, toast, kielbasa (great addition to the breakfast foods.) It was a very chill day. I met a BUNCH of her friends when we went to see the movie brave. This was also my first interaction with Maggie. See, I needed Maggie to like me. She is quite important. She spent the first few sentences to me analyzing my face from an artists perspective. "Your nose it nice. It's symmetrical. Symmetrical people are pretty. Your eyes are too close together though, and I don't like the color" It was the weirdest dinner I had ever had. I didn't really know how to react! But Jacquelynn helped me out with her words and the conversation shifted. Brave was good. I really enjoyed it. I really enjoyed holding Jax's hand during the movie. After the movie, we did what all small towns do, we hung out at the walmart! Happy friends time! I liked getting to know Matt and Maggie more. I have heard about their escapades in WalMart many times, but being a part of one was special for me. Included. Part of her life.

It is really weird, and awesome, as well, because we really did just fall into perfect step with one another. It was like I had been holding her hand, sneaking small kisses, and riding around Hillsdale with her my entire life rather than a day. Cuddling together just worked, being together just worked. I had one of the best Zoo experiences ever with her (I keep saying best and most, and I feel it might seem a bit over used, but the problem is that this week was the best of my life by far. I don't think there is a single thing that Jacquelynn couldn't make better just by the fact that she was there, so yeah, all of the bests.) Except for the fake owl. Damn the zoo. It doesn't even make sense for them to have a fake owl. It's a ZOOO. Lame. She got some great pictures though, and I spent the entire day trying to convince her of the danger of giraffes. They have powerful clomping hooves! I've heard tales of their terror! Tuesday we went and saw a movie and had a pretty chill day. It was nice. I took her to Applebee's...Angry. They messed up her order so badly. Much anger. Also on that fateful Tuesday, Jacquelynn spent the night with me at the hotel. I had said that I thought she should stay over Friday night, since it was my last night in town, and she said that she would see. Then we were thinking that maybe we should do it on Tuesday as well since we were going to Michigan Adventures in the morning. It's great logic, it's a long drive, easier to start in one place. Anyway, it was a pretty awesome night. I had never really slept in the same bed as someone, ever, and me and her slept pretty well together. The only problem that night was the room. It was like a fucking desert. Super cold, we need every blanket, super hot, no blankets. It was really annoying, but we still slept pretty well. So well, we actually changed cuddle positions in the night. Went to bed with her being little spoon, and woke up with me being little spoon. We're just awesome.

Michigan Adventures was fun. I haven't been to an amusement park in awhile, and I have never been with a significant other. It was great with it being just the two of us. We rode a lot of water rides. She screams on those. It's the cutest. I wish that I could have taken her in a roller coaster. But, she isn't the biggest fan, and she was feeling sick. Which is okay, she was prepared to go on one with me despite all this. She is a wonderful girl. Oh...we got sunburned. Quite badly. My shoulders are still hurting a good bit. She developed a truckers burn since her AC was broken and her window was down the whole time. That day was so tiring. We had plans for the evening, we ended up just getting a pizza, eating that, showering, and sleeping. The next day brought some very uncomfortable heat with it. It was SO hot and sweaty. Shopping on that day was the worst plan that we had. I don't even want to talk about it. We got a few shirts for me, a jacket and a shirt for her and we went home and had dinner with her family. Tasty dinner. Friday night we made this awesome chicken for dinner. It was a spinach stuffed chicken. The filling was spinach, onions, mozzarella cheese, and garlic salt stuff. The chicken itself (which i smashed most of) had bread crumbs and parmesan cheese on it. We almost made a super tasty risotto. We cooked rice in chicken broth and garlic roasted cream of mushroom soup with carrots and green onions in there. It was so fucking tasty. My mouth is watering thinking about it. We also made a pie, which was also good. I made the crumbley part that goes on top. It was the best part of the pie. I enjoyed cooking with her. WHEN she comes down to North Carolina, we will be making a meal for my mother. And whoever else is there.

Jacquelynn took me to swing club on Friday night. I was really nervous and that reacted badly with the number of people that were there. I kinda shut down for awhile. She took me aside and taught me a little bit of the basics and that helped. Even though I had a little bit of a hard time with everything, I really enjoyed dancing. I would really like to get better. Which is good, because Jax LOVES swing dancing. So I kinda need to like it. I would like to at least get decent at it. Might not be anytime soon though. I have to find a place to learn/do without having the problem of people over load. She had a good time there I think. She looks so pretty when she dances. After swing, I got us a bottle of wine, and we enjoyed out last evening together. It was really nice and late. The next morning was way too early and extremely sad. As weird as it felt to fly and see the girl I had met through the internet, it felt even more strange to be leaving her behind. Why would I leave all of that behind. She is so amazing, it makes no sense to my brain to fly away from that. And everything felt so natural. Like it was where I was supposed to be. I managed to hold it together for the most part (though admittedly, I am fighting some tears right now). I lost it a little bit when I read a letter she wrote for me. And going to bed for the first time in 4 days without her was pretty tough. I miss her so much already. It's crazy.

But yeah, It was an amazing trip. My favorite trip. I am in Love with that girl. I'm already trying to think of when the next time I will be able to see her is. As she said on her blog and facebook. It's not goodbye, It's see you soon.