Sad Soup

So I told someone very special to me that I would blog today, so here goes. I suppose I do have something I would like to talk about.

Thing one, reading. I have started reading again. Well, not really. I mean, i would have if I could have found the book I was looking for these past few days. I have tried to buy The Fault in Our Stars for about three days at 3 different places in Boone and even checked our library. My efforts were fruitless, so I have ordered the book and expect that it shall arrive within the week. However, I am sort of reading. Or rather being read to. Me and Jackie decided to read a few books together, and since I wasn't able to get my hands on the book, and we both really wanted to start, she read to me last night. It has been the longest time since anyone has read anything to me. It was very nice, I hope to return the favor soon. Though it is going to take a few days. Jackie did a wonderful job as well. Also on our reading list: A Clockwork Orange (that one will be tough, it's dense...), Room, and The Hunger Games

Also, for all the people who told me how awesome John Green is, you are correct. This book is the first of his I have ever read and I am enjoying it quite a bit.

In other news (thing two), Megan and I are talking again which is nice. It's good to be past all the drama. I don't like drama that much. Which is weird, because I like to know. Everything. They contradict. Silly Sean. Anyway, yeah, Mego texted me the other day and we have been better ever since. She is going to NY soonish, and to a Doctor Who themed bar. I'm jealous. I love Doctor Who a great deal.

Thing three. Me and Jackie talked a little bit about the future today and the idea of being a parent and how crazy it is. First of all, creating life is a bit crazy. Just, a tiny human growing inside of someone. Madness. Going further on that train however is the idea of raising a child. I have NO experience with that (obviously) and yet I am responsible for this chiles well being and how they are raised. Super scary. Then we started wondering what type of parents we would be. I would honestly like to think I would be a good parent. But I really have no idea. I am positive that Jackie would make a good mother however. I feel she is more patient than she knows. And very full of life and awesomeness. Yeah, I didn't get to respond to her earlier when we were talking. She had to go be awesome at an RA interview. So yeah.




I heard from Matt today. I miss him so much. School and work have kept me so busy it is hard to find time to go home. Hopefully we will have a Skype date soon!

Alright. Closing up here. Supernatural is an awesome show. I am liking it more and more. Also, I am watching Arrested Development again, which is also very good. I am determined to beat The Binding of Isaac soon. And I need to find a Scarf, a Button-up Shirt with stripes, and a Vest.

Graduation

I have just graduated to becoming a full Facebook stalker. I am not proud of it. And will hopefully never do it again. BUT my mother just informed me that my brother was out on a date with a girl named Stephanie whom (i think) he had met at the school and hung out at our church Cafe. That is all I had to go on. I started my search SO SURE I was going to find this girl. After a few false leads and points wall searching. I came up empty handed. However it was not this lack of success that made me stop. NO, it was what I did discover. I found a Stephanie that my friend's younger brother was dating. It gave me pause, this Cameron could not be the same guy, I told myself. However, after clicking on his name I knew it was him. It was grown up Cam. And grown up Cam looks a lot like my friend. It was one of the weirdest discoveries of my life. I am still not 100% over it...

In other news. Work today was a mixture of easy as pie and super busy. David and I managed to do a decent amount of set up and take down of the rooms no longer being used and soon to be on Monday. I feel like a real manager as I had the keys and I was making the big decisions on what to do. The event we were working, however, was not the best organized. They switched the Middle School and High School bands locations today. We were constantly telling people that they were in the wrong place and where we THOUGHT they should go. We really didn't have much of a clue because no one told us. We pieced it together from half conversations. Then I gave the interior door keys to the next shift and I was done for the day. That was the best part. Not staying until the end. Best. Ever. I rarely am not there for the end of an even I am working.

I am currently helping Jackie write an Essay for her Western Heritage class. I really hope that I can be a great help to her. She has had such a stressful week. Anything I can do to lighten the load for her. Hopefully we are going to watch a movie tonight. No idea what movie, but I will enjoy it no matter what. For one it will be with her, and I just enjoy movies anyway. In case anyone was curious, Jackie is examining the use of imagination in Dante's Inferno to the views of Montaigne on imagination. She is proposing that while Montaigne is suggesting that imagination is a powerful thing that can actually bring about things, Dante has a line which must be crossed.

Also, Megan wrote a blog post today. I still don't know exactly what I think about it. I have mixed emotions. I am glad to see that she is doing well at least. I hope that continues.

Finally Friday

How many blog posts in the world do you think have used such a cliche title? Mine is no more justified. I am sure I could come up with a witty title, (as all my others are SO witty) but I have no desire to do that. As I have said many times this week, it has been quite a stressful one. Not so much for me as I only had one test, which scared me to pieces but still. Jackie on the other hand had a ton of stuff to do and was quite stressed constantly. She handled it like a boss, however. I knew she would. She is a pretty amazing person. She helped me out a lot this week as well. With the small amount of stress that I did have, such as the test for which she was very supporting.

I am currently at work taking care of 186 middle school children, some of their parents, and their teachers. 186 honors band kids. It is an interesting bunch that range in ages quite a bit. I am positive that they all can't be in middle school. They look so tiny. Anyway, kids produce trash and mess at a rate which is unbelievable. I have never seen so many mountains in trash cans before. It was a very messy process cleaning up after them. I am so glad I have the morning shift tomorrow and I won't be breaking down everything after the. They have a lot of stuff. Also, many of them are awkward. And there is a lady that looks like the principle from School of Rock. I'm ready to be done though. I have to be here bright and early tomorrow morning at 6am. Crazy times.

I have food. It is time to eat now. 

How cool am I?

SO I'm at work right now, but me and Daniel, my boss, have already finished setting everything up for the day. Well, at least in the next few hours. The student union has a lot more that goes on during the day than at the Broyhill. It's pretty crazy to look at the event sheet down here. (down because the Broyhill, my other and primary place of work, is the highest place on campus. You. Can get a real workout walking up that hill. It is ALL incline.

Anyway, the reason I decided to blog...well the real reason is because I'm pretty bored right now. There isn't much to do, and Jackie, to my knowledge, is still asleep. I would text her, but I am nervous about waking her up. She needs her sleep. Especially for today which is going to be very stressful. I am actually a little stressed right now as well. I don't want my principles of accounting test back... It makes me super nervous. I already know I need to focus more on that class than I have been. I don't need to see my sadness. I'm scared.

UPDATE: I got back my test and released a huge sigh. I got a 91. My friend Jay beat me by one damn point. Congratulations Jay!

On a final note, the reason I am son cool is because I am doing this on my iTouch. While walking. I'm so cool.

Long week and it's only Wednesday

This week has been an extremely long one. Especially if you toss in Saturday and Sunday, which is where something that have been a problem this week have started.

Last Saturday, while at work, I did a blog post about a friend of mine as well as some feelings about Jackie. My friend, Megan, read that blog when she was done with the event and since then we have been having some difficulties. Jackie has talked a little bit about it in her last two post as it now deals with her too. Last night it got worse and now Megan is not talking to me at all. Megan saw Jackie's blog post that Jackie wrote on her blog about her attempts to help the situation. She was angry that I had talked to Jackie about what was going on. I talk to the people I care about with issues that I am having. I care about Jackie a great deal, I talk to her about pretty much everything. I know Jackie cares for me a great deal, so not only will she want to help me and try to do her best in that aspect, but she isn't going to use anything that I tell her in a diabolical way. What I told her also wasn't personal. I wouldn't talk about Megan's secrets. The few I may know.But this situation with Megan was one that had me quite worried, so I told Jackie. I do not apologize for that. But Megan, I think you are being a little silly.

On other notes, this week sucks in other ways as well. I have bed times now. It is something that I have needed for a very long time. Without them I will stay up to all hours of the night. The only reason I am actually following them now is I have someone who enforces them. Which is awesome and sucks at the same time. I think eventually they may be all awesome, because I will actually be getting a decent amount of sleep, but this week has been so busy that because of my bedtimes my time talking to Jackie has been a good bit limited. Even now (yes I know it is Wednesday), after I am done with most of my immediate work and am in a lull, it's hard because the week (and now more) is super busy for Jackie as well.

It's okay though. because if we can survive the semester, and I one of my two summer sessions, I plan on going to visit her. It will be the first time I have ever taken a vacation by myself, flown by myself, and paid for an entire trip myself. I really think that it has a high probability of happening. She feels her parents will be okay with it, and even though mine aren't really necessary, I feel my mother would be on board once I explain everything. I'm sure once everything gets solidified and it gets closer I'll stat to get extremely nervous, as this will be the first time I have spent anytime with Jackie for more than 30 minutes. In person at least. So fingers crossed for no crazy expenses and plane rides in the summer.

Housekeeping! I work twice this weekend (counting Friday night) I work Friday night, until sometime, and then again Friday morning at 6. BUT at least I then have the rest of the weekend and don't work again until Tuesday. I've been watching this show called Samurai Champloo which is quite good. Also, I'm hungry. That is all.

Mego is Dying in the Redneck Wilderness: a Story of Survival

So, Megan is in Mount Airy today celebrating her fathers birthday. She has been sending me distress texts all day. She is on the very edge of the imaginary cliff. I have tried to help her; she needs to acclimate in order to survive. She needs to take some of that super redneck beer that they have lying around, down a few bottles, and become one of them. It is in her blood. She can do it. She has it in her. The problem, however, is that she is not taking any of the very excellent advice that I am giving her. She is instead sitting all by her lonesome and trying to not be noticed by being quiet. This plan has a high probability of failing. Once she is noticed and brought into the part by the crazy rednecks, there is nothing that she can do in order to blend back into her hiding place! UPDATE: Megan is drinking Natty Light. She may make it after all. The blending has begun. SECOND UPDATE: Scarves are now the topic of conversation, Megan and her hipster self has something that she is an expert on. She may be okay. She may make it. Small victories as she says.

On a different note, that first part only came about because I didn't know what to title this blog. I don't really even know what I want to write about. I just know that I wanted to do one. I am sitting in the back office of my workplace, all by myself. It's sad, because someone does have to be here at almost all times, and i wasn't going to make Casey or Kristin, my two coworkers for the day, sit back her all by themselves. I would feel bad pushing this solitude on someone else, especially a girl. Though that is from my silly personality. Plus this event I am working is a primarily all male event. Despite the fact that everyone here is probably an upstanding person who would never do anything, you just don't want to ever take that chance. Especially when the entire building is unlocked. Anyone could wander in here right now. So yeah, safety.

On a different different note, life is pretty good right now. I might even go as far as to say fantastic. There are a lot of stressful events that are going on around me, with all of my classes having as many exams as possible in a very short amount of time, and school work in general is starting to come up, and while all that is happening work is finally starting to go into full swing. Despite all that I am happy. I've been kinda happy for the past year and months and such, since my big downfall into sadness, caused by an evil girl. But mostly I have been angry and sad. No longer is that the case. And the best part is that it isn't ALL because of a different girl. Over the Christmas holiday, I figured out a few different things. I can't really place when it happened or anything that may have been a catalyst, but i have leg go of the past. It's a relief really. The new year started with me not hating the world for being a terrible place. I wasn't as angry and actually happy.

Of course, that alone couldn't put me at the level that I am currently. There is a girl. Not a new one really, she has been around for a very long time. 4 yearsish? The details get fuzzy with my strange High School experience, but I have known her for ages. Over the past year, we have had a lot of ups and downs in our relationship. The last down was a time in which we didn't talk for a few months really, because of me and a decision I made. Now, however, we have entered into a kind of friendationship. We talk often and both share a complex array of emotions and feelings towards each other. The biggest problem we have is the 712 miles between us. And for that reason we are not currently pursing any kind of legitimate relationship, at the moment. We both just look at the unknown future and think that it may one day become possible. Honestly, this wording is a bit of a downplay. We both would really like the opportunity to see what would happen. I feel that it could quite possibly work out very very well. I am planning on attempting to visit her this summer. It is starting to look more and more like a reality. If I can get the money to take a trip up there I would be extremely happy. It would be nice to see her in person for more than the 30 minutes I saw her once on a trip back from visiting family.

Alright, some quick house keeping. If you don't listen to We're Alive, the Zombie podcast of Survival, you need to. It is an amazing radio drama that has captured my attention like no other zombie story ever has. It is amazing and everyone should give it a shot. The first few episodes are a LITTLE shotty, but it quickly gets it's legs and explodes into an amazing story and piece of art. I destroyed my Tax test. It's awesome, I feel I really understand that stuff. Uh, I think that may be it...Yeah. I need to get a sign off thing. Because this stuff is not covering it.

Fhursday

What a week. It's has been the longest one I've had in awhile. Between working late on Tuesday night, to two test that I had on Wednesday this week as been quite stressful. I'm so glad that it is almost over. It feels like it is a Friday to me. Which makes the fact that it is only Thursday extremely depressing. This weekend is hopefully going to be enjoyable, though I have work on Saturday now from 4 to 12. I am making bank this week. However, I have another test next Tuesday, and I work Monday night. The universe is against me at the moment it seems.

On a super positive note, I have started talking to Jacquelynn again. It has been quite enjoyable and relaxing. He birthday was this week. I was a little late getting her gift to her, but I think she enjoyed it. She likes Owls. And letters. I'm planning on talking to her later tonight and I'm looking forward to it.

The Binding of Isaac. Great game. Go play and buy it now. It is amazing. Super fun and addicting. In fact, I am playing it right now.

Yeah it's acceptable

This is a test.

Library Woes: Day 2

I'm back in the library again. This time with Jay, my accounting counterpart. We wanted to do some studying for our exam in CIS 2050 tomorrow. I don't feel as if we really studied at all. We went through most of the study guide. The problem is that the study guide is pretty terrible. It is a straight copy of multiple choice questions with the answers take out. So many question are impossible to answer. Such as, "Which of the following is not true?". What? How would I use that to study. It gives me absolutely nothing to go on. There are some that at least give me something, asking which are not aspects of information systems. Still terrible, but at least something.

But I have a good amount of time tomorrow to study, and I don't really feel motivated today, so it is no problem. Jay has decided to call in his meal that I owe him. The cheap bastard. He doesn't recall the time that I bought Jimmy John's for everyone last semester. It's not actually a big deal, he is just shoulder surfing and compromising my security as I type. I should know better, we were just "studying" about that very thing. He has gotten me plenty of times before, though i have paid most of them back. It's all good. Things even out between friends eventually.

Uhhhh, yeah. I just want to give a nod of approval to an amazing podcast that i have quickly become addicted to. "We're Alive" is an amazing radio drama about a zombie apocalypse, the first few chapters are a little slow, but once it picks, it doesn't slow down. Fantastic. I apologize to everyone who I told that I liked it before I really became hooked. I just didn't understand.

Library Woes

This is rapidly becoming the thing I do in the Library when all my work is done. I really don't have much i want to talk about right now because I am SUPER stressed for some reason. I feel like I should be doing more work than I am, but I have two tests so I should focus on them or something and I don't want to fail I want to be awesome and my iPod cable spazed out and deleted most of the stuff on my iPod so I am having to resync everything to it right now, and I don't know how to build a resume and I need to start making one but I haven't done anything important in my life at all related to accounting and I want to be home in bed eating cereal. Hoping for a better tomorrow.